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There once was a doctor named Lisa
From Connecticut, she did hail
Homeland Security’s mail
Told her to leave in dismay
But she’s determined to stay

There once was a journo named Druke,
Who predicted with no fluke,
That the lawmaker’s bashing,
Of Trump was quite smashing,
On his most obvious weakness he shook.

There once was a young man so mean,
At Florida State, he caused a scene.
The gun he did wield,
Was his father’s shield,
A deputy’s son, now a teen.

There once was a flight crew all-female
Promotion sparked outrage, did prevail
Women’s empowerment they tout
Gender experts weighed in, no doubt
Their views on the matter, set sail.

There once was a judge with great fervor
Who criticized an administration’s error
They claimed they couldn’t free
The man sent to El Salvador, you see
Reagan’s appointee’s voice was a terror

There once was a platform for gamers,
In New Jersey, they faced some clamors.
Predators were a threat,
To underaged users, a bet.
Lawsuit claims they didn’t do enough, naysayers.

Many insiders think it’s a fact,
That the cannabis industry won’t lack,
It’s too big now to fail,
And it’s starting to prevail,
Rolling back would just be a setback.

There once was a lawyer named Pam,
Who sought to implement a deathly plan,
In Manhattan she said,
Prosecutors should be led,
To seek the death penalty, damn.

There once was a man named James Bennet
Who admitted that he had “blew it”
He wrote in error
Of a governor’s terror
But now he’s in quite the tight knit

There once was a plant called marijuana
Insiders hoped for sales that would soar
On holidays combined
Their profits aligned
Praying for success more and more