There once was a host quite agitating,
With a reminder so blunt and deflating.
To the president he said,
“You’re negotiations are dead!”
Oh, the “Daily Show” host, always berating.
There once was a “Late Show” host so bold
Who found a flaw in claims that were gold
From the president it came
But he called out the blame
And left everyone in the room cold.
There once was a worry in the land
About recession, oh it was so grand
Half of Americans fret
Survey found, you can bet
Hope the economy will soon stand
The port’s director saw with dread
A drop in shipments lie ahead
As American stores
Hit the brakes, no more
Imports, a decline in trade spread
There once was a lady named Kerry,
Who thought her brother was quite contrary,
She said with a grin,
“I love him, but he’s in sin,”
Their differences kept them quite wary.
There once was a man named Akeel,
Charged with a crime quite unreal,
Voting by aliens, they say,
Could land him in prison to stay,
For a year, his fate he must deal.
There once was a chick who was fine,
It didn’t want to be human’s sign,
The technique was sure,
To keep it secure,
From identifying with mankind.
There once was a man named Zvi,
Who inappropriately touched where he’d spy.
He groped both kids and adults,
During physicals and with results,
Now he faces the law’s watchful eye.
There once were import taxes severe,
Threatening our manufacturers clear.
But a reversal took place,
Bringing smiles to each face,
Now the future’s looking quite near.
There once was a congresswoman, who
Challenged the Republicans’ view
She called out their lies
To their great surprise
Their promises, not one came true