John Oliver Makes ‘Incredibly S**t’ Prediction About The Next 4 Years

There once was a host with insight
Who shared how to get through this plight
On “Last Week Tonight” he’d convey
Advice to brighten your day
His wisdom shone so bright, so right

‘They’re Not At The Gate Anymore’: Michael Steele Issues Most Chilling Trump Warning

There once was a chair from the RNC
Who criticized the president with glee
For giving “absolute power”
To Elon Musk, in this hour
It’s a move that’s not sitting too free

American Arrested In Moscow On Drug Smuggling Charges Is Freed Ahead Of Russia-U.S. Talks

There once was a move quite grand
To ease tensions in a far-off land
Between Moscow and DC
In Saudi, they’d soon see
If peace could be close at hand.

Mike Pence Emerges As One Of Few Republicans Willing To Challenge Donald Trump 2.0

There once was a VP so bold,
Whose bond with Trump was quite cold.
Refusing to part,
Defined them in part,
Their time in office was told.

Aubrey Plaza Subtly Honors Late Husband Jeff Baena With ‘SNL50’ Outfit

There once was a star of “White Lotus”
Made an entrance to wow us
After her husband’s demise
Stepped back into the limelight’s eyes
Bravely facing the fuss and the buzz

‘Life-Threatening Cold’ Hits Parts Of U.S. Following Deadly Weekend Flooding

Meteorologists warned with good reason,
Of a polar vortex’s icy treason,
Tenth time this year,
The cold drew near,
Sending shivers through every region.

Julianne Moore Says She’s ‘Stunned’ To Learn Trump Admin ‘Banned’ Her Children’s Book

There once was a book with some charm,
Freckleface Strawberry’s the name,
For the Department of Defense,
It caused quite some suspense,
Now under further review, it remains.

Delta Air Lines Flight Crashes At Toronto Airport, Injuring 18

There once was a passenger in flight
Left with “critical” injuries, try as he might
Eighty people on board
A scary ordeal, oh Lord
Hope he recovers and everything turns out right

CNN Legal Analyst Says Trump DOJ Is Causing ‘Existential Crisis’ With Eric Adams Case

There once was a mayor named Adams,
Whose corruption charges caused a madam,
But the Justice Department said stop,
Trump’s favor, they couldn’t top,
So the case was dropped, no grand slam.

‘Way Sooner Than You Think’: James Carville Names Key Date Trump May Be Dreading

There once was a strategist sly,
Who warned Democratic figures nearby.
He said, “Watch out for the game,
It’s not always the same,
In politics, you must be spry.”

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