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There once was a Late Show host who
Had an odd moment, don’t you know
The president’s answer
About tariffs did gather
And took an unexpected turn, oh

There once was a man named Polis
Who flipped the president’s crisis
He turned it around
With a smirk and a frown
Proving his political prowess

There once was a woman named Susan,
Whose words caused quite a commotion.
With one simple line,
Cheers soared, all feeling fine,
For her powerful, impactful notion.

There once was a senator from Jersey
Whose speech was incredibly wordy
Lasting 25 hours straight
It left us all in a daze
Frank Luntz explained the impact quite clearly.

There once was a paper so bold
Whose editorial board foretold
How the president’s slight
Could spark quite a fight
And leave Republicans feeling quite cold.

There once was a rock star quite bold,
Who feared what the future would hold.
After his European tour,
He couldn’t endure,
The uncertainty left him cold.

There once was a man named Kilmer
Who battled cancer, a grim thriller
Though he recovered
His fate was uncovered
He passed at 65, a heart-wrenching pillar

There once was a mayor from the city,
Whose case was dismissed, what a pity,
Judge Ho made it clear,
Charges couldn’t reappear,
Now Trump’s team is feeling quite gritty.

There once were two sisters, Bennett,
Who accused their own brother, no less.
In New York they filed suit,
Their wallets to recoup,
For they claim he enriched, to excess.

There once was a lawsuit so bold
For work done in days of old
Five million to pay
For 100’s display
Before the election, we’re told