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Tim Miller, with words quite a jest,
Lamented Hegseth’s personal mess.
He called it absurd,
With qualifications blurred,
For defense, he’s not fit, I confess!

In South Carolina, Mace took a stand,
But her past’s not quite in demand.
Desi caught her in lies,
In the spotlight, she cries,
Performative acts that don’t go as planned!

In Pennsylvania, a shift in the air,
Sen. Casey bids politics fare.
Though McCormick has won,
Fetterman’s words weigh a ton,
Claiming Casey’s the best—beyond compare!

In Banning, a tale takes a twist,
A cold case that once was dismissed.
Lewis claimed he was clear,
Then a new lead draws near,
Now suspicion’s a shadowed list.

In a twist of sheer talent and flair,
Simone Biles joins Snoop Dogg with care.
On ‘The Voice’ they’ll shine,
Mentoring divine,
A duo that sparkles beyond compare!

In the headlines, the drama won’t quit,
Five more ladies say Diddy’s the git,
With lawsuits they come,
As the troubles grow dumb,
For the mogul, the heat’s getting lit!

In Kentucky where shadows ran deep,
A sheriff took a perilous leap.
He shot a judge dead,
Now faces dread,
In court where the secrets will creep.

In Florida’s sun with a frown,
A tale of a mother renowned.
Delfina, so bright,
Stashed knives out of sight,
From Victor, who’d turn her life upside down.

In a post that raised quite the debate,
Ginger Gaetz said, “It’s time to celebrate!”
With a tone somewhat snarky,
The response was quite darkly,
As folks mocked her, oh isn’t it great?

In Congress, Nancy Mace made a scene,
With a bill that some labeled quite mean.
Her aide took to task,
“Is this all just a mask,
To get on Fox News, what a scheme!”