There once was a man named Timothy,
Who said Democrats’ policies were gimcracky,
Their leadership, he did stress,
Was a total hot mess,
In need of a new strategy.
There once was a host, so bright
Who joked about doing what’s right
The part of him more
Wanted to ignore
But in the end, he saw the light.
There once was a study that said
Far-right attacks are a cause for dread
Outpacing all other crime
In this troubling time
We must act before more blood is shed
There once was a Harry named Enten
Who said the concept had taken off like a rocket, amen
It soared in popularity
With the party, quite hilarity
Now it’s a hit, again and again.
There once was a consultant named Jamal
Who cited a vow from the presidential
To investigate groups of the left
After Charlie Kirk’s death, it was deft
Now they’ll probe what they think is best.
There once was a man named Tyler Robinson
Who shot Kirk in the neck with precision
From the roof of a building nearby
With a rifle, oh my oh my
Now he faces a legal collision.
There once was a prof who did scold,
For power, the admin had bold,
An increase so vast,
Would surely outlast,
Their control the prof did uphold.
There once was a man named Robinson
Who kept a secret till he was done
Texting his roommate, he
Confessed to his spree
Now his fate is no longer unknown
There once was an MSNBC host,
Who accused the president, almost boast,
Said he used outrage,
To cover the stage,
Of stories he did not want to post.
There once was a man from CA,
Who had a lot to say,
About Trump’s White House crew,
Their comments he blew,
Newsom spoke out right away.