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There once was a man with great sway
Touted foreign policy one day
He spoke with such pride
His achievements implied
But critics had much to say

There once was a veep named Vance
Whose remarks caused quite a stance
The president also implied
The same thing, which can’t be denied
Their ideas they both did advance

There once were 600 staff cut from CDC,
Their layoffs causing much misery.
No longer employed,
Their futures now void,
Their plight felt by all, you’ll agree.

There once was a journalist named Doocy
Who asked the president quite loosely
About his afterlife
Causing quite a strife
Fox News viewers were sure to see.

A nor’easter is churning up the East Coast
As Alaska grapples with catastrophic flooding.

There once was a president bold,
Who tried to rewrite what was told.
He wasn’t in the mix,
But tried for a fix,
His story left the truth out in the cold.

During a sold-out show, Chappell Roan
Sent a big F-you to the agency known
For shaking LA’s area
She made quite a hysteria
With her bold and rebellious tone.

There once was a bar on St. Helena
Where a shooter caused quite a scene-a
Four people lay dead
And many more bled
In a tragedy that felt so obscene-a

There once was a chopper in flight,
Above a beach in broad daylight,
It started to spin,
And couldn’t quite win,
Crashing into palms, what a sight!

In Manhattan court, lawyers did sport,
Claiming cops did not have the report,
Without a warrant in hand,
They searched through the land,
Mangione’s backpack, they’ve been caught!