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There once were some agents so bold
Who knocked down doors in the cold
In the dead of the night
Causing quite a fright
As they hauled folks away, we’re told

There once was a candidate so hot
Borrowed a line from a TV slot
New York City mayoral race
With a show’s iconic embrace
In the spotlight, he surely did not flop.

There once was a man named Russ Vought
Who put funding on hold, as he thought
No money should race
In a discriminatory place
So his budget direction was sought.

There once was a host, Daily Show,
Whom the president didn’t go toe to toe.
Colbert, Kimmel, Meyers, and Fallon,
Faced his attacks, one and all in the dawn.
But from Daily Show’s host, he did stay in the low.

There once was a press secretary named
Whose answer left many ashamed
When asked if ERs
Should check who they nurse
She dodged and she never proclaimed

There once was a host of late night,
Who mocked the right-wing with delight.
Their freakouts were vast,
But he had the last laugh,
And his jokes always hit just right.

There once was a president who
Served up prime slop for his MAGA crew
With lies and deceit
His followers did eat
Blinded by his false point of view

One group “will ensure” it ends,
Said the former Cabinet member,
With plans to uncover,
The truth they will discover,
Their quest for justice extends.

There once was a host full of glee,
Who said, “Why not? Keep it fun for us!”
On “The Tonight Show,” he’d boast,
With humor he’d always toast,
Bringing laughter to you and me.

There once was a host who’d assail
The president, calling him frail
For openly stating
He’d lied in his debating
Late Night’s host could not fail