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There once was a store known as RH
Who sourced products from far away
In Asia they’d find
All the goods that aligned
With the vision of CEO Gary.

There once was a man named John,
Whose house was graffitied upon.
As “Genocide John” and “Gisele,”
The vandals did spell,
Leaving John feeling quite forlorn.

There once was a man named Harry Enten
Who said Americans don’t want Trump to be messin’
With his new taxes on imports so grand
They just want to wash their hands
And be done with this political lesson.

There once was a man named Kessler
Who warned us all of a pressure
Time is running out
For cuts to shout
In Health and Human Services treasure

There once was a Veep who did say,
At the Leading Women Defined Summit one day,
In California he spoke,
And the audience awoke,
Inspiring many in every way.

There once was a host from CNBC
Who accused the market quite angrily
“They cratered the stock
And left us with no shock
Just a big mess for you and me!”

There once was a billionaire’s plan
That made Eugene Robinson ran
After four decades so grand
He left the newspaper and
His farewell was quite a fan.

There once was a president so bold,
Who handed out cards made of gold.
With his face on display,
Wealthy buyers could pay,
For citizenship, or so we’re told.

There once was a host of Late Show,
Urgent appeal to “the cabal” did throw,
When Trump’s tariffs took a slash,
Causing stock market to crash,
Oh, how it caused quite the woe!

There once was a president who yearned,
For a change in the course that was turned,
In Upstate New York,
He spoke with a fork,
Saying Trump’s moves left him concerned.