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There once was a man named Trump
Whose rallies were quite the hump
The comedian joked
That he slyly poked
At those who fell for his stump

There once was a man named Massie
Who called out Congress so sassy
They left town in a rush
Before the Epstein files hush
Now Massie’s making them feel a bit crassie

There once was an airline delayed,
Extra flights were the cause, it obeyed,
Wednesday night would be slow,
Customers felt quite low,
But patience is all that it bade.

There once were agents at Home Depot,
Raiding for immigrants to rope,
But a court put a stop,
To their profiling crop,
Now they must find a new hope.

There once were some folks in despair
Deprived of medical care
In crowded cells they did dwell
Suffering a living hell
Investigated by Jon Ossoff with care

There once was a man named Big Balls,
In Trump’s DOGE he stood tall,
Slashing bureaucracy was his goal,
Edward Coristine, a true role,
His impact was felt by all.

A filmmaker with views quite bizarre,
Wrote of dinner parties, not far,
In a sex offender’s place,
An unsettling embrace,
Controversy rose like a star.

There once was a show so bold,
Homeland Security stole, we’re told.
They used an image
From the latest scrimmage,
But the show fired back, being bold.

There once was a president who,
Spoke to the press from a zoo.
A highly odd place,
For his media face,
But he wanted a change of view.

There once was a gator from Indiana,
Locked up in its own Alcatraziana,
A spin-off was made,
The gator displayed,
In a show that was quite the pandana.