Florida Republican Bans Jelly Roll From District Because He Made Jokes About Trump

There once was a singer named Miley
Jimmy Patronis said rather wily
She’s not welcome here
In Florida, it’s clear
To the panhandle she can’t come by-y.

Judge Dismisses Lawsuit By Elon Musk’s X Challenging New York Hate Speech Law

There once was a case of great fame
Dismissed with prejudice, what a shame
X cannot amend
Their case, this is the end
No more legal moves to reclaim

Darline Graham’s Attack On ‘Government-Run Health Care’ Draws Backlash, Mockery

There once was a lawmaker from SC
Whose statements made a plea
For better health care access
To alleviate societal distress
His words unintentionally set minds free

Blake Lively Granted $400K Of $8M In Legal Fees She Sought From Justin Baldoni

A judge ruled against Lively’s plea,
For legal fees she sought to be free.
California law
Has limits, he saw,
To shield survivors from harassment spree.

Ricky Schroder Posts Tone-Deaf, Inappropriate Dolly Parton Tribute

There once was a star of “Silver Spoons”
Whose views caused some social swoons
In his tribute to the singer
Anti-trans, anti-vax zinger
He stirred up some heated monsoons.

U.S. Military Says It Killed 4 In Strike On Alleged Drug-Smuggling Boat In The Caribbean

There once was a boat strike so grand
By the U.S. military, oh so bland
The victims now tally
At least two twenty seven, sadly
A tragic event across the land

In A Divided America, The Left And Right Unite To Oppose Artificial Intelligence Data Centers

In Murdock, two data centers may rise,
Debates rage, tensions reaching the skies,
In this small Nebraska town,
Plans paused, opinions abound,
The future brings uncertain ties.

Meta Reaches $16.68 Billion Settlement Over Social Media Harms To Children

There once was a deal put to the test
Allegations of harm, we confess
Social media’s claim
On young users, the blame
Will it end? We all must address

Stephen Colbert Shows Love To Jimmy Kimmel By Backing 1 Thing ‘We Can All Agree’ On

There once was a host named Colbert,
Who in a statement was never short,
He supported his friend,
In a sweet video send,
With humor and wit to comport.

Bill Gates Sounds Alarm On ‘Turbulent’ AI Transition

There once was a man with great clout
Who worried tech was too fast, no doubt
In an essay, he’d write
Of his fears in the night
As the world kept on changing throughout

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