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A coalition saw through the guise,
Of the president’s tariffs, unwise.
They declared it a sham,
Just a “pretext,” a scam,
To replace old excuses with lies.

There once was a man named Trump,
Whose ratings took quite a bad slump,
From 37, he fell to 35,
In the polls, not a jive,
His approval was in a big thump.

There once was a man named Aaron F.
Arrested for starting a fire one day
He was booked for arson
His fate was quite harsh on
In connection with the Old Trails Fire, they say

There once were two reporters, Alfonsi and Pelley,
From “60 Minutes” they were recently shunned,
Now they’re leaving the newsroom,
To teach in the classroom,
Their new journey has just begun.

In New York, face coverings we don,
To show ID, it’s now also done,
These measures took place,
In June’s warm embrace,
For safety, they are now number one.

There once was a president strong,
Who described a video with a song.
In a novel new way,
He had much to say,
In limericks he never went wrong.

There once was a man in Delaney Hall,
Whose death was not the first of them all,
Senator Booker did lament,
Without action, more lives will be spent,
In this detention center’s cruel thrall.

There once was a coach named Pochettino
Hired in 2024 for quite the show
To replace Berhalter
At a salary much greater
Six million a year, quite the payday to bestow

There once was a star named Torres
Whose hat caused a bit of uproar
With Trump’s name, he wore it
And quickly deplored it
Now he’s back on the field, scoring more

There once was a president in fret
Who hadn’t made up his mind just yet
Decisions were slow
Which way to go
On this issue, he couldn’t forget