There once was a guitarist quite weary,
Of playing on U.S. stages so dreary,
In an interview he said,
He’d rather play dead,
Than perform in a place that’s so eerie.
There once was a man named Mangione
Whose fate was decided in court alone
The judge ruled with glee
No death penalty for thee
In the case of the CEO Thompson.
There once were critics on Twitter
Who switched out some letters in their
Tweet, causing a fuss
But they made quite a mess,
And now their words make us snicker.
There once was a runner named Chiles
Whose medal was taken with wiles
But from Paris Olympic’s appeal
The bronze may be hers, no ordeal
She hopes for reinstatement with smiles.
There are clashing accounts we’ve obtained
Of how Ryan Wedding was detained
Some say he complied
While others have lied
The truth may never be explained.
There once was a president in power,
Whose remarks caused quite a loud clamor,
Accused of giving the bird,
To the young ones, absurd,
Backlash came in a fierce shower.
There once was a host late at night
Who mocked Fox News with great delight
For asking the first lady
An absurd question shady
It was truly a ridiculous sight
There once was a president who,
Creeped out social media, it’s true,
Appointed Burgum quite sly,
As interior secretary, why?
The reasons remain a hullabaloo.
There once was a “Late Show” host so merry,
Who mocked the first lady, quite contrary,
Over her documentary,
Causing quite a fracas, quite contrary,
But his jokes were not received too kindly.
In a couple of days, I’m going home
My heart aches and starts to roam
The pop star did say
In an impassioned way
About America, where she did comb