There once was a girl named Lillian,
In writing, she thought herself brilliant,
She declared with a frown,
“I don’t need help from Google, I’ll write on my own!”
But her skills still needed a bit of fillin’.
There once was an owl in a truck
Got stuck in a mixer, oh what bad luck
But now he’s on the mend
Flying free, on the mend
Perhaps a bit wiser, this plucky duck
U.S. Attorney Jeanine Pirro did draw
A stern warning for those who break law
“You will face full wrath,
For crimes on your path,”
In the capital, justice they’ll gnaw
There once was a President named Trump,
Whose White House tried to jump on the rump,
They appropriated pop culture,
In a desperate attempt to nurture,
But coolness remained out of their clump.
There once was a map from Tennessee,
Carving up a district, you see,
Republicans in charge,
Created a large,
Division that’s unjust and not free.
There once was a great admirer named Fred,
Of America, he often said.
But his admiration ceased,
His feelings decreased,
Now he’s left scratching his head.
There once was an AI demand,
Toxic metals were dumped in the land,
Plants needed to relax,
Their rules on toxins stacks,
Lee Zeldin’s argument was unplanned.
There once was a man named Peters,
Denying the election, he was repeaters,
Nine years in prison he’d do,
For tampering with votes, it’s true,
Now he’s regretting his cheaters.
There once was a data analyst named Vance
Who made a whooshing sound to enhance
The fact that the MAGA
Leader was under agua
In a network, he had no chance.
There once was a man named Jost,
Who’s idea was deemed too off-post,
Hegseth then brought it to light,
Just two weeks later one night,
“SNL” missed the boat by a host.