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There once was a man named Blakeman
Who, when questioned, did not back down
He doubled down on his views
In a local New York news
His stance he would not disband

A woman named Shotsie Buck-Hayes
Set a council member ablaze
In a jealous fit
She didn’t quit
Now in prison for 40 long days

There once was a singer named Lionel,
Who sat down on stage – feeling ill,
He sang “All Night Long,”
Though the dizziness was strong,
But his fans loved him still, they will.

There once was a singer named Clayton
Whose hits from the 60s still play
With “Spinning Wheel” and more
His voice did explore
And made us all feel so very happy

There once was a host from Fox News
Who told David to change his views
“Stop with the politics,
And the transphobic kicks”
In a rant that just gave us the blues.

There once was a mogul of fame,
Charged with a crime that brought shame.
But prosecutors did agree,
To drop the charge, set him free,
No longer in the legal game.

There once was a Seinfeld star so bold,
Who stories of free speech told,
He defended Colbert and Kimmel,
In a monologue so nimble,
About art and the power it holds.

There once was a woman called Gonyea
Who claimed she was visited by DEA
They said they were checking
Threats she was reckoning
Against ICE, she feared for her pay.

There once was a justice who said,
“The consequences of today’s decision are predictable,”
From the bench where he sat
His words did fall flat
And left many feeling misled.

There once was a man named Trump,
Sophistication he would often plump,
But in many ways he was buffoonish,
Carlson’s assessment was not outlandish,
In some things he was a chump.