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A New Yorker shot by ICE agents in Marble Hill,
Declared by the department, a verifiable chill,
The claim now is clear,
No need to fear,
In New York City, beware and keep still.

A storm is approaching with might,
Expected to make landfall at night,
Bringing surge and strong gales,
Flooding homes and closed trails,
Tornadoes may add to the fright.

There once were two people so bad
Put differences aside, Kimmel was glad
For the greater bad they did conspire
Their terrible ways did not tire
In harmony, they were truly mad

There once was a lady named Pillay
Who spoke of the president’s thirst each day
His obsession with the award
Left her feeling quite floored
She couldn’t help but reference in dismay

There once was a man named Murphy,
Who questioned in a hurry,
“What, is he mimicking ISIS executions?”
Inquiring about dark illusions,
In search of the truth, he did scurry.

There once was a gal named Zacharia,
Who claimed she was a lifelong conservaria.
She praised Trump with such glee,
As the best in history, you see,
But her views may cause quite a hysteria.

A bloodied actor once said
Two dudes hit him on the head
With a gun and a knife
They disrupted his life
And then quickly fled, filled with dread

There once was an admin quite rude
To the court, it had long been quite crude
Sanctions on judges and more
Hostility they did pour
The Trump team was often quite shrewd

There once was a coach named Ditka,
Won titles as player and big shot,
With the Bears he did reign,
In the NFL fame,
His legacy will never be forgot.

There once was a man quite the dreamer,
Who thought the grass was much cleaner.
He crossed to the other side,
But soon realized he lied,
The grass was just as green, no meaner.