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There once was a man named Trump,
Whose followers jumped through the hoop,
Nicolle Wallace did air,
Their contortions with care,
Showing the lengths they would stoop.

There once was a state secretary,
Who looked quite contrary, you see.
To Lara Trump he explained,
Why his look was so pained,
In a photo that went viral, you see.

There once was a Spider-Man show,
Some feared it would not steal the crow,
But the audience came,
With much more acclaim,
Interest higher than ever did flow.

There once was a congresswoman bold
Who left the Republicans, we’re told
A massive move she hinted
After she had printed
Her departure, a story to be retold

UEFA said with passion and zest,
We’ll boycott FIFA’s event fest,
For selling the sport’s soul,
Is beyond our control,
In football, we won’t be oppressed.

There once was a woman named Bash
Who confronted a man with a rash
He tried to spread doubt
But she called him out
And left him feeling quite brash.

There once was a man from Idaho,
Who caused quite a tragic show,
In a fast-food diner,
He turned out a real briner,
By taking his own life as the blow.

There once was a fire, big and grand,
In the northwest it took its stand,
Keila Vizcarra did say,
The team’s on their way,
To control the blaze and lend a hand.

There once was a league in the rain,
For women with baseball to gain.
They played with such flair,
In the wet, they did dare,
Reviving the sport once again.

There once was a player named Skubal
Joined Dodgers, a team that stands tall
With Ohtani and Betts
Yamamoto, no regrets
Now they’re ready to conquer them all