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There once was a party quite blue,
Hoping Texas would turn that hue,
Enten declared with glee,
Their polling’s the best we see,
For a Senate seat that is new.

There once was a man named Edwards,
Who sent texts to young staffers in wards,
Inappropriate and late,
In a report of great weight,
Now his reputation is in shards.

Certain areas are seeing a notable increase,
In population, resources, and peace.
It’s a welcome change,
Bringing joy that’s not strange,
May this prosperity never cease.

People feel bamboozled, said Sarah,
A slap in the face, so unfair,
Promises broken,
Their trust now outspoken,
Their disappointment hangs in the air.

There once was a host named John
Who knocked a police department’s con
Their explanation was poor
For tapping cameras galore
Last Week Tonight exposed their wrongs

There once was a president bold
Who claimed victory, so we’re told
In a tournament fair
But the cheating was there
Allegations now quickly unfold

There once was a board quite conservative
They talked of Iran’s dominance imperative
“Signals of weakness,” they cried
As tensions with Iran intensified
Their worries were quite extensive

There once was a president bold,
Who threatened Canada with a scold,
For the wildfire smoke,
That across the border awoke,
Retaliation, the story foretold.

Organizers said they did not want
“To provoke, but to pause power” is their taunt
For a moment they’ll raise
Something human, for praise
Their message, in unity, will flaunt

There once was a president in power,
Who posted pics by the hour,
In strange situations he’d be,
With two other presidents, oh gee,
Leaving everyone quite dour.