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There once was a mogul named Musk,
Told by Chef José he was brusque,
“You’re a tyrant, it’s true,
Change your ways, start anew,”
Now Elon’s behavior’s less brusque.

There once was a Senator named Bill,
Who criticized the CDC’s ill will,
He slammed them for the fear,
That parents hold dear,
Their decisions now harder to fulfill.

There once was a teen from Georgia
Charged at Capitol, quite a pariah
With a shotgun in hand
And body armor so grand
Now guilty of firearm, the liar

There once was a judge from L.A.,
Who ruled the singer must stay.
Without any bail,
In a legal detail,
Charlaine Olmedo had her way.

There once was a bridge o’er the Detroit,
To Canada and the U.S. it’ll employ,
For trade and for tourists,
It’ll never be porous,
As a critical route it’ll bring much joy.

There once was a judge named Gorsuch,
Who claimed we’re not from the same church,
He said it’s just not true,
Our beliefs are askew,
Our origins he tried to disavouch.

There once was a journalist from NBC,
Who believed Nancy Guthrie’s abductors, you see,
Had tried to do things right,
But kept details out of sight,
Leaving the truth a mystery.

Most Americans are unsure of Trump’s goals,
The survey revealed deep in the polls.
His policies unclear,
Leaves the nation in fear,
As uncertainty constantly rolls.

A group of marmot researchers
Is trying a new way to raise
Funding for their work, it’s no craze
Their plan is arousing
Lots of attention, quite amazing

There once was a man named Pinder,
Arrested for hazing, what a hinder,
With two others in tow,
They gave brutal blows,
Now in jail they must all surrender.