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There once was a man named Greenspan
Whose light touch on banks was his plan
Critics now say
It led the wrong way
And caused the Great Recession to span

There once was a president bold,
Who left folks completely perplexed and cold,
With his evening message so vague,
Many were left in a rage,
Wondering what secrets it told.

In the Western U.S. it was warm,
Temperatures rose with no harm,
From Rockies to coast,
Hot weather engrossed,
Next week will bring more alarm.

There once was a president, smug and cool
Blaming “vandalism” for the pool
But a lady spoke out
With a loud shout
Her comments made him look like a fool

A mayor from Chicago did vow,
“No violence in our city now!”
Those responsible, beware,
Accountability is near,
Said Mayor Brandon Johnson, I avow.

There once was a rock band so sad,
Their statement confirming the bad,
They said they were reeling,
From the tragic feeling,
Their hearts were all heavy and mad.

There once was a boat, big and mighty,
Attacked by the military so flighty,
More than 60 in the hit,
Over 210 now sit,
Lost to the strikes ever so blighty.

A DEA agent named Howell,
Schemed to poison his town to the full,
To make more cases, he’d say,
Till the truth came to play,
Now his actions are under a cloud’s cruel scowl.

There once was a president bold,
Who warned Iranian diplomats, we’re told.
Breaking centuries of precedent,
His message was quite evident,
In diplomatic circles, quite cold.

A host named Bill backed a plan
To bomb Iran and change up the land
After strikes from the two
War’s flames soon grew
Real Time’s stance was not very bland