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There once was a pastor from NC
Who led a prayer with great glee
But his past was quite grim
As a sex offender, quite dim
Twice to prison he went, you see

The U.S. recalls 9/11 with sorrow,
Twenty-five years since that dark morrow.
Nearly 3,000 deceased,
Left the nation increased,
In remembrance, our hearts still do follow.

There once was an incident of hate,
Lawmakers found it disturbing, not great,
They slammed the display,
In a strong disarray,
A clear message: this bigotry we abate.

National Review’s Cooke made a claim,
A “reckless, shapeless, irritable spasm,”
Divorced from our government’s aim,
His words caused a stir and a spasm,
In politics, Cooke sought to reclaim.

There once was a president bold
Whose promise caused quite a scold
To send five grand
If Republicans command
In the midterms, the story still told

There once were some attacks at sea,
Shipping routes disrupted, oh me!
The Middle East’s in fear,
For the supply’s not near,
Oh, what a catastrophe spree!

There once was a president from the west,
Who tried to get the crowd to do their best,
But he kept getting sidetracked,
And his speech became whacked,
For his words were a confusing mess.

There once was a company’s report
On AI’s safety, it did purport
Employees spoke out
With worries, no doubt
Of misuses and risks to exhort.

There once was a man named Joe,
Investigations he used to know,
But he’s no longer in charge,
Of a case that was large,
Now his role is for others to show.

There once was a president’s vow
To pay out the funds somehow
But skeptics recall
His promises all
That never came true, and they scowl.