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There once was a network called NBC,
Whose coverage of games was quite a spree.
For the Milan Cortina show,
Viewership numbers did grow,
Highest in years, you’d agree.

There once was a ski star so fine,
Whose engagement ring did shine.
On camera she beamed,
As her love was esteemed,
In happiness, she crossed the line.

A lawmaker and five of his crew,
Faced grand jury, but no charges flew.
Trump accused them of treason,
But no crime was the reason,
Their seditious words did not ring true.

There once was a man named Ilia,
Who kept his fans in a reel-y,
With teasing and such,
They wanted so much,
For his next move to appear freely.

There once was a President, the link,
Who was called “coin-operated” by a shrink,
Said the NYU professor,
“His actions are lesser”,
It’s the one thing that could make him blink.

There once was a man from D.C.
Who acted quite rude at Chili’s you see
He did what they do in Congress
But they gave him the egress
Now he’s banned for life, oh me oh my!

There once was an airport in El Paso,
Where crime groups caused quite a fiasco,
With unmanned drones in the air,
Creating chaos and scare,
The authorities had quite the task, though.

There once was a shop named Mean Arms,
In New York they faced certain harms,
They stopped selling a lock,
For high-capacity block,
To prevent any rifle gun charms.

There once was a man with great clout,
Whose friendships were in doubt,
With sex traffickers he’d mingle,
And now they all tingle,
At the scandal that’s come about.

There once was a late-night host bold
Who called out attorney general’s hold
For ducking the Epstein files’ queries
He exposed the truth with no queries
And left the attorney general cold.