NBC Apologizes Over Repeatedly Misgendering Trans Olympian

There once was a commentator, indeed,
Who referred to Lundholm as a he,
Competing in moguls,
Inappropriate boggles,
Sweden’s Elis, correct pronouns need.

French Duo Beaudry And Cizeron Triumph Over Team USA’s Chock And Bates For Ice Dance Gold

There once was a French ice dance team,
Who followed world champs with a gleam.
Their performance was near perfection,
They skated with such great affection,
And wowed the crowd with their dream.

Manatee Rescued From Florida Storm Drain Recovering At SeaWorld Orlando

There once was a mammal quite grand,
410 pounds of blubber on land,
With a rescue so fine,
Back to sea in no time,
Thanks to teamwork so carefully planned.

The Trump Administration Blamed Cartel Drones For Closing El Paso’s Airspace. The Real Story Appears Much Dumber.

There once was a man named Duffy
Who declared the threat was quite stuffy
The airspace was closed
For hours imposed
But now it’s all clear and not scruffy

Lawyers Of Chicago Woman Shot By Federal Agents Say Documents Show How DHS Lies About Investigations

There once was an attorney who said,
“Not trusting officials is dread,
Their words are unkind,
We’re left far behind,
In their promises, lies are widespread.”

Investigators Fan Out In Search Of Nancy Guthrie, Analyze Discarded Glove

There once was a lady named Nancy
Missing for 11 days, it was chancy
Investigators searched
A black glove was lurching
Forensic tests to solve the mystery.

Right-Wing Pundit Rips Pam Bondi, Then Makes A Damning Prediction For Republicans

There once was a host Erickson,
Who said the AG should be gone,
Fired or resign,
Was his firm line,
To the listeners he did inform.

Ukrainian Artist Behind Banned Olympic Helmet Says World ‘Doesn’t Want To See The Truth’

There once was a designer named Iryna
Whose helmet design was quite the arena
Featuring athletes slain
In war’s cruel domain
A challenge to face war’s grim demeanor

‘Play Your Sport’: JD Vance Scolds Olympians Who ‘Pop Off On Politics’

There once was a veep who did say,
To athletes at the games far away,
“Expect pushback, my friends,
If politics you defend,
At the Olympics, you might rue the day.”

America’s Jordan Stolz Sails To Speedskating Gold In Record-Breaking Olympic Debut

There once was a skater so swift,
Who in Milan had quite the gift,
At just twenty-one years,
He conquered his peers,
In the 1,000 meters, spirits lift.

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