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There once was a president, you see,
Whose “sir” story had a twist so free.
With humor and charm,
He caused no harm,
Just a tale that brought glee with glee.

There once was a storm named Isaias,
Bringing rain to the Gulf Coast with pizzazz,
Flash floods might arise,
In the Southeast skies,
On Friday, it’ll surely cause a buzz.

There once was a man from Tennessee
Whose lawyer argued quite cleverly
The failed execution
Of Christa Pike’s retribution
To save him from his felony

There once was a lawyer quite bold
Who claimed a retreat was pure gold
At a Trump-friendly site
Said it would be a delight
A gift for the American fold

There once was a teen from afar,
Who thought he’d buy a gun, oh what a bizarre,
He paid an FBI agent,
For an AK-47, quite flagrant,
Now he’s arrested, behind bars, oh how bizarre!

There once was a senator named Mike,
Whose new ad caused quite a spike,
Attacking tariffs on Canada,
But forgot to mention the planner,
Now he’s in a bit of a strike.

There once was a president, quite bold,
Who wanted his name on the show’s mold,
Threatened to destroy,
The arts center’s joy,
But in the end, the plan was unrolled.

There once was a woman named Pike,
Angry and confused, what a strike!
Survived an execution,
With no restitution,
Randy Spivey, her attorney, to like.

A promise the state did not keep,
To seek future execution, a leap,
Said Pike’s attorney with dread,
A long road to recovery ahead,
In court, the battle goes deep.

There once was a Fox News personality
Who said Republicans will fail with much clarity
People don’t think beyond cash
In the midterms they’ll crash
Their wallets will dictate the majority’s rarity.