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There once was a doc named Reiner,
Who said COVID is a real stainer,
He warned it’s a concern,
For all to discern,
And urged us to be a restrainer.

There once was a president who, in a fit,
Fired off an angry rant, so unfit,
At Rep. Jamie Raskin,
A frequent critic, aaskin’,
For trouble, sure, he did not expect it.

A spokesperson from Alabama’s DOC,
Said the execution was off, it’s a lock,
No other method they’d try,
For the rest of the night, he did cry,
No lethal injection, just talk.

There once was a deranged act so dumb,
Vandalism that left people numb.
Interior Department’s dismay,
Spokesperson had to say,
Such destruction is quite troublesome.

There once was a man named Vance Boelter
Who killed the Speaker and her helter-skelter
He pleaded guilty that day
For the crime in his way
A dark tale that no one could shelter.

There once was a Health Secretary
Who lacked access to those of authority
Covering trivia all day
Inventing their own way
A challenging situation, quite contrary

There once was a data guru from CNN
Who analyzed the president’s tone now and then
His political statement
Was wildly out of sync with the sentiment
Of most other Americans, amen.

There once was a city named New York,
Where life was a never-ending cork.
While the country did burn,
In the city, they’d learn,
That joy was their only New York perk.

There once was a user who said,
“NASA and UFC, in my head,
Are totally identical,
Said with a chuckle quite cynical,”
To the secretary’s analogy they led.

There once was a Fox News host quite bold,
Who warned, “Republicans, be not so cold.”
“Americans are feeling the squeeze,
Trump loves inflation, if you please,”
Inflation is something to behold.