There once were some cardinals three,
On “60 Minutes” they let their thoughts free.
They criticized the administration,
Which led to a heated conversation,
Just before the president’s meltdown spree.
There once was a CNN data chief,
Who said the vice president brought grief.
Making history all wrong,
In a sad, sorry song,
For all the news was too brief.
A president tried to be grand,
Posted an AI image so bland,
As Christ-like he’d heal,
But critics did squeal,
Artificial mess, not quite in demand.
There once was a leader named Trump,
Who mocked the Pope in a grump.
He claimed his own fame,
For the Pope he did blame,
In a feud that left many in a slump.
There once was a host, Bartiromo,
Who asked about prices that grow.
When Trump gave a shrug,
She tried not to bug,
But her eyes couldn’t hide what they know.
There once was a president, bold and strong,
Who entertained a renaming song.
As he veered from a question,
Avoiding aggression,
In his likeness, the proposal belonged.
Oil prices are rising, traders dismayed,
U.S. announces a blockade, they say,
Iranian ports to be closed,
The market is hosed,
As prices climb higher today.
There once was a man named Colin Jost,
Who reminded the president with a boast,
That Iran “literally” had,
A nuclear weapon so bad,
Making America less grandiose.
There once was a golfer named Rory,
At Augusta, he told a sad story.
But others charged back,
For the title, they’ll attack,
In the final round, it’s a worry.
There once was a president who’d say,
That the U.S. would finish Iran one day,
At the core of the fight,
Was Tehran’s nuclear might,
He would strike at the right time, so he’d say.