There once was a Rep named Swalwell
Whose attorney rang a bell
Urging supporters to cease
Their calls for his release
A rush to judgment they could tell
There once was a chief named Gulotta,
Who said the attacks were a lotter,
Random they seem,
Like a bad dream,
In transit, they caused such a bother.
There once was a man named Madrid
Who urged Dems to discuss instead
The race for governor in CA
With allegations rife on Friday
A robust debate must be led
There once was a host on TV,
Who supported the war in Iran with glee,
He said he didn’t “hate it,”
When it started, no debate it,
His views on war we now see.
There once was a Rep from Cali,
Who wanted to talk to a tally,
Of crimes that were grand,
From Epstein’s dark hand,
Against women and children, so scally.
There once was a man named Swalwell,
Accused of a crime straight from hell.
A woman claimed he had crossed the line,
In 2019 and 2024, it’s no sign of decline,
The news spread like wildfire, oh well.
There once was a “Briefing” show host,
Who made a bold and shocking boast,
That the first lady’s action,
Would bring back a scandal faction,
In single-handed reignite they would coast.
There once was a man named Peachey,
Who made a bomb for guests to be breezy,
But his plan went awry,
It was all a big lie,
Now he faces the law, oh so queasy.
There once was a survivor who said,
Safety should be prioritized instead,
This administration’s lack of care,
Leaves survivors in despair,
Their negligence fills them with dread.
There once was a secretary who
On CNBC’s “Squawk Box” would argue.
Against claims that were defensive,
He countered, quite offensive,
Leisurely, he continued to pursue.