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A cheerleading tycoon with zest,
Declared Kirk’s a president best.
Media mogul did say,
He’ll lead the U.S. one day,
Future head of state in the quest.

A justice from the court supreme,
Questioned mail-in voting, a scheme.
Based on the name of a holiday,
Legality he tried to sway,
In court arguments, a fiery beam.

There once was a professor quite new
Played by Essiedu, Black actor, it’s true
In a Hogwarts adaptation
He’ll join the cast celebration
Breaking barriers, making history too

There once was a truck in a hurry,
Told to stop in a flurry,
The driver complied,
And slowed with great pride,
Avoiding a crash in a scurry.

There once was a president who, with might,
Took credit for an idea so bright.
Then he spun a wild tale,
About an office item, without fail.
But the truth was lost in the light.

There once was a data analyst from CNN,
Who found a number that made him say “yikes” with chagrin.
He analyzed the data,
And then said “Oh, fata,
This number is really a sin.”

There once was a host quite bright,
Who exposed the cops with all their might,
Undercover operations he deemed full of sin,
Last Week Tonight’s host delved right in,
Revealing the dirty undercover fight.

There once was a man named Gracey,
Found in waters off Barcelona’s beachy.
He was last seen having fun,
Outside a night club he did run,
Now his tragic end seems so hasty.

There once was a tribute quite bold,
To the president, we’re told.
Mocked in all sorts of ways,
Through ridicule and haze,
A limerick of laughter it strolled.

A Kinks guitarist quite strong
Used support from two, came along
Trailblazing musicians
To clap back with precision
At Moby’s song take, not wrong