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There once was an agent named Connolly
Whose lawyers filed a motion, oh golly
To overturn his murder rap
With evidence, no trap
Tied to mobster Bulger, how jolly!

There once were the undiagnosed dead
More likely Hispanic, others it’s said
People of color, they were
Left without a clear answer
Their identities still in dread

There once was a briefing quite tense
On Epstein, a man of offense
Accused AG of dodge
With a legal entourage
Inquiries left in suspense.

There once was a man named Graham
Who warned of a dangerous scam
Weapons-grade material they’d get
To create a bomb and cause a threat
Religious Nazis, oh what a grand slam

There once was a man in a beanie,
With sunglasses, tank top so greenie,
Approached a pygmy hippo,
Tablet in hand, oh so sly, though,
Security footage caught all so cleanly.

There once was a YouTuber so bold
At the White House, many videos he sold
With one that he made
A portrait displayed
Servile, his actions were told

There once was a man who could groom,
He deserved an award in the room,
Survivors did say,
He’s the best of his day,
His talents could surely consume.

There once was a venue so grand,
With walls scarred by bullets that land.
The construction crew came,
And tore down the same,
Leaving memories buried in sand.

There once was a woman named Jen,
Who scolded the president again,
His claims were unproved,
Her monologue smoothly grooved,
Showing falsehoods from where they all stem.

There once was a girl named Loomer
Who saw a structure of great grandeur
But to her dismay
She forgot to say
It was Islamic, the monumental allure