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A statement from Trump did declare
That Iran’s team should not dare
To travel to the U.S. land
For their safety won’t be in hand
So they’ll skip their trip without a care

“That’s a problem,” said the late night host,
As he pondered a challenge to post.
With wit and with charm,
He raised no alarm,
His solutions were always the most.

There once was a President named Trump,
Whose policies made his base jump.
On “The Five” they did say,
Their optimism did sway,
As his actions caused quite a slump.

There once was a woman from Utah,
Whose children’s book was quite the rub,
She coped with grief,
But her husband’s death brought no relief,
Now convicted of murder, a sad hubbub.

There once were four presidents so grand,
Who said they’ve not spoken with Trump, so bland.
No contact, they claim,
In Trump’s recent fame,
Their distance from him is quite grand.

There once was a president who said,
“Statehood, #51, anyone?” he pled.
On his Truth Social site,
He made the proposal right,
To add a new state, so it’s said.

There once was an anchor named Kasie,
Who had trouble following, oh so hazy.
She said, “Did you follow that?”
It was quite tit for tat,
But in the end, they weren’t too crazy.

There once was a star named Marty Supreme,
Whose comments were quite extreme,
The director shaded
His ballet and opera tirades,
At SXSW, it was quite the scene.

In mid-Atlantic states it was feared,
High winds and tornadoes appeared,
Forecasters were right,
In their eerie foresight,
Washington, D.C. now was seared.

There once was a health secretary
Whose program caused much controversy
But laughter’s the best
To combat the stress
Of “Make America Healthy Again” decree