There once was a man named Cheung,
Who worked for Trump, that’s no lie,
He praised a liberal news source,
Which caused quite the uproar, of course,
A rare sight from a Trump ally.
There once was a trooper named Baldner,
Who caused a tragedy quite tender,
He rammed an SUV,
And caused a death, you see,
Now he’s convicted of manslaughter.
There once was a tax renouncee,
Who found the whole process quite easy,
At 80% off,
He could finally scoff,
And bid his U.S. citizenship adieu.
There once was a teacher so bold,
Who slipped on a surface so cold,
A vehicle hit,
In a lighthearted skit,
Now in pain, their story is told.
There once was a judge named Graf,
Whose decisions were always chaff.
He was urged to keep
The proceedings not too deep,
By prosecutors, widow, and staff.
There once was a man, what a fright,
Who rammed Temple Israel one night,
The security team
Ended his scheme,
In West Bloomfield Township, so tight.
There once was an economy quite strong
But its growth started to go wrong
From 4.4% to 3.8%
The numbers were not great
In GDP, the trend was not long
There once were some indexes that we seek,
Three weeks of losses, so bleak,
Investors did fret,
But haven’t given up yet,
Hoping for gains next week.
There once was a lady so chic
At a White House event she did speak
She talked about herself
To boost up her wealth
In the limelight, she found her mystique
There once was a comedian bold,
Who urged a talk show host to unfold,
“You’ve got to go the hell off,
On the last show, don’t scoff,”
The Late Show was the place to be told.