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There once was a niece named Evers,
Who spoke of history with fervor,
She said with great pride,
“You can take all aside,
But history will remain forever.”

There once was a man named Mangione,
Who said as he walked all alone,
“One plus one equals two,
This is double jeopardy, it’s true!”
But the judge ruled against his bemoan.

There once was a mayor from the city
Who ignored a wise saying so witty
He worked with kids and with beasts
Despite warning from deceased
Now his troubles are sure to be gritty.

There once was a ride-sharing app,
That claimed assaults did decrease quite fast,
Despite jury’s decision to slap,
They planned to appeal and not collapse,
Their arguments they would unwrap.

There once was an actor named Bruce,
Married to Melissa, that’s no ruse.
Denying allegations with all his might,
From “Little House,” his wife’s in sight,
In the spotlight, he’s now in the news.

There once was a lady named Nancy
Who vanished one Sunday, quite fancy
Her disappearance a mystery
Leaving folks feeling quite queasy
Where she’s gone, no one can fancy

A man who thought he was sly,
Filmed people without their reply,
But now he’s a victim,
Of his own filming dictum,
And regrets ever giving it a try.

There once was a market named Dow
It surged, reaching high, oh wow!
Topped fifty thousand with glee
Recover’d from losses, you see
Stocks making a strong comeback now

There once was a Gov. named Newsom
Called on “every single Republican” to come
Denounce the president
Over the clip, he went
In his plea, he stood firm and glum

There once was a man in Benghazi
Who caused quite a big melee
Attorney General Bondi
Said he’s now in custody
For the attack that killed four that day