There once was a star named Fonda
Who stood up for the First Amendment agenda
In counter-programming delight
She fought for what was right
With a personal stake, she was a defender
There once was a favorite in the match,
But the debutants caused quite a dispatch.
Their keeper Vozinha,
Had a game that would win ya,
Stopping shots like a well-oiled latch.
There once was a president bold,
Whose birthday bash was quite cold.
With a UFC fight,
On the White House site,
Critics’ words were harsh and he’s told.
There once was a man from Florida
Whose literacy program had a flaw
“Read to Suceed” he did tout
But a spelling mistake snuck out
Byron Donalds, what a faux pas!
There once was a veep, so they say,
Who made a comment one day,
Attacking women sans kids,
He admitted it was a bad bid,
Designed to provoke in a way.
Global markets were filled with glee,
As stocks rose and oil prices were free.
A deal with Iran was struck,
To get crude flowing, no luck.
Now the world can breathe easy, you see.
Unless someone finds an amazing cure
And really soon, tonight will be the last
Newscast I anchor,” he said
Now he’s filled with dread
His future uncertain, he’s not sure.
There once was a B-52 in flight,
Crashed after takeoff one fateful night,
In California’s desert it fell,
A sad tale the officials did tell,
A tragic event that caused much fright.
There once was a cop named Stotts,
Charged with manslaughter, he got lots
For shooting a man,
Naked, in a tan,
While on duty, his job he forgot.
There once was a sauce quite divine,
From Coffee Connexion Co. in line,
Recalled due to fears
Of salmonella sneers,
In Lebanon, Tennessee, they did find.