Man Is Dragged To Death By A New York City Subway Train After His Bag Snags On A Door

There once was a man from the city,
Dragged to his death, what a pity,
His bag got caught,
By the subway, it fought,
Now he’s gone, what a terrible ditty.

Gentle Giant Backpack Declared Winner Of Alaska’s Fat Bear Week

There once were some winners so wise,
In everyone’s eyes they’d arise,
Their skills were so grand,
They’d always take a stand,
In our hearts, they held the prize.

Trump Botches The Name Of His Own Country In Truly Embarrassing Flub

There once was a president who,
Caused people to ask “what to do?”,
His decisions were bold,
But left many cold,
In the end, all they could say was “Oh phew!”

Jimmy Kimmel Roasts Trump For Dozing Off At Worst Possible Moment

There once was a man, Trump by name,
Whose insults were his claim to fame.
But when aimed at his past,
The response was so fast,
His own words brought him shame.

R&B Star Gives Trump White House An Ultimatum Over Song In Controversial Ad

There once was an artist named JMSN
Whose music Trump used without permission
He fought back with great might
To protect his work’s right
And now he’s the one in position

Donald Trump Hands His Critics An Irresistible ’S**tty Job’ Soundbite

There once was a president bold,
Whose remark spread fast and took hold.
Shared on social media,
It went viral, no anesthesia,
His words, a story retold.

Megyn Kelly Visibly Stunned By Bleak Midterms Forecast: ‘Oh, Good God!’

There once was a wave, said Kelly, “wow,”
More than blue, we’re a tidal wave now.
With power so vast,
We’ll surely outlast,
And leave our opponents to cower and bow.

Former ‘American Idol’ Singer Caleb Flynn Convicted Of Fatally Shooting His Wife

There once was a man named Flynn,
Who played music with a grin.
But the jury’s quick decision,
Caused him much derision,
For his fate was sealed in a spin.

Mike Johnson Makes Winning Midterms Argument — But For Democrats

There once was a man named Johnson
Promising to keep things the same
But his policies led to a war
With Iran, causing prices to soar
Now voters see through his deception

GMA’s Will Reeve Reveals Testicular Cancer Diagnosis At Age 34

A young man named Will Reeve,
Said, “This year has been defined by change.”
Three months post-wedding he learned,
Of a diagnosis, his heart churned,
In sickness and health, he must rearrange.

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